A garden that's bursting into life

I don't quite know how to say, how I feel.

At all. Very rarely do words escape me. That doesn't mean I always want to say what I'm thinking, but the words are always there. The kind that are tied to how I'm feeling that is. For clarity's sake, it goes without saying, the creative kind can go MIA all the time.

So much is good in my life right now. So much more than I've thought possible in a long time, and yet it's still so not what I want.

I want change. On some level anyway. But who doesn't? Not many people I know anyway.

Maybe we want changes because we want to reinvent ourselves. Maybe we want changes because we've already outgrown our current position, and somewhere inside of us knows that we can't stay anymore or our internal and external environments are to be at odds against one another forever. I don't know. I don't claim to know anything. Not of any importance anyway. I just feel like this montrous need to purge myself of everything that's jumbling my head right now and I'm writing until my fingers are too exhausted to type, or my mind's too exhausted to produce more thought, off-blog of course. And perhaps, for now, that time has come.

* Geez, my blog has gotten pretty not worth reading lately... this is definitely a place for me to come right now and vent.  For those following what I say, I apologize.