This week has revealed one thing to be certain — that friendship isn’t a “something” but rather a “doing something.” It’s an intangible “be” verb that necessitates action. It’s kinetic inertia.
Now it goes without saying we all know that friends are important. They make our day-to-day lives worth bearable, fun. You name it. But it wasn’t until this week have I really appreciated what “truly good friends” are, and what they mean to me.
That’s because this week I’ve been on both sides of the friend spectrum. On one side, I was friend in dire need of a friend. Someone to just “be” with me. No need for talking. For exciting adventures out. But someone just to “be” there. I needed to know that through hateful words and tears, I mattered. That I was worth… anything. Because in the moment I felt broken and broke down. And there was NOTHING more I wanted in the entire world than to feel as though I had a friend. But I didn’t. In that moment, what it takes to be a friend was first revealed.
Flip to the other side. I hear terrible, awful news from a friend. It overwhelms me. It’s her health. It’s in jeopardy. Immediately I can think of nothing else in the world than “being” there for her. Cancel my evening concert plans. Put work on hold. Silence the phone. I want nothing more than to “be” the friend she needs. To “be” the kind of friend I needed the other day.
And that’s just it. At some point we have to grow up and decide that “being” a good friend means being there for a the messy times. The times of heartache. The times of need. The fun stuff is easy. Anyone can do that. But the value of a friend is truly determined when you need one most.
So it hits me. If they don’t already know (and I sure hope they do), my friends need to know that I “am” here. All hours of the day. Always accessible. If I have plans, they can be canceled. If I’m being a lazy bum, I can get up. Because frankly, I give a damn and I’m going to “be” here for the good, the bad and the ugly. Because friendship — it’s a “be” verb.
| Made this especially for the blog & pinterest tonight.
|For fun, Lilly Pulitzer computer wallpaper
Why hello 2012, you seem to be full of surprises already, don’t you?
In true Elizabeth fashion, 2012 has started out with quite the bang. From unforeseen personal drama (yeah this crap didn’t used to happen, wtf is up with that?) to mono (hello feeling bad), this year is already more than I can take.
Yet somehow in the insanity of it all I had a breakthrough with my parents. Or rather they “broke through” to me. In a rather not-like-my-parents style, they “cut to the chase.” For the first time I can remember since late 2008, they refused to hold back and told me like it was/is. Because the subject is not quite ready for public opinion, I’ll refrain from further explanation for the moment, but let’s just say my parents blatantly told me what several friends have been telling me for months — enough is enough.
And that was enough. Hearing it from them confirmed my suspicions. I knew my friends had been right all along. I knew better along the way. But I never gave into my gut feelings. I always fought them. Go figure, doing what’s simple doesn’t always work for me. Heck, I said I “hit a wall” on this very matter back in July and I’ve yet to remedy it.
But like I said, enough is enough. The time has come. I think.
All of that said, I made a fun Lilly Pulitzer desktop wallpaper for my gorgeous iMac. It actually complements the Lilly desktop calendar for January, so you can proudly display them side-by-side. Check it out:
|January 2012. Lilly Pulitzer-inspired computer wallpaper.
Until next time.
Having grown up with a silver spoon in my mouth, I’ve been privileged enough to not really want for anything. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve worked hard for a LOT of things, but I’ve always been well-provided for.
When my parents cut me off in college and when I CHOSE to stay cut off after they offered to care for me once more that game changed. I learned to be self-reliant. I stopped taking handouts. Even gas money for trips home to NC (maybe that’s why I only go 2x a year). Even shopping excursions with my mom — if I couldn’t pay for myself, I didn’t want to go. It taught me a new level of responsibility and I was proud of myself for cutting the purse-strings that far too many of my friends still heavily rely on.
A few weeks back when my parents did the unthinkable — offer to buy me a new Mac computer I gave in to their generosity for the first time in over 7 years. It’s not that they’ve not been willing to help me sooner, I’ve just not been willing to take their money and revert back to the “I’m a dependent” system. And come on, a 27″ iMac, how could I resist? Especially since I really did need a new computer.
Now, I’m faced with unemployment once more. Another candidate’s loss is my wallet’s loss. Politics is tough. In complaining to my father, he mentions that they’ll (my parents) will help me out if things get tough. Having used up almost every dime to my name this year I’ve got about a month left before I have to consider moving, or something. I’ll most definitely become a waitress before that happens, but how did employment become this difficult?
It’s partially my fault. Hell, maybe all of it. I’ve not applied for jobs in over 2months. I’ve been happy working with the clients that I had. Giving myself fully to my campaigns. That was stupid. In hind-sight anyway. I had 1/2 a dozen other potential clients that have sought me out and yet they’re just sitting there waiting. The campaigns doing this are failing to realize what they’re missing out in the new media sphere. That and I’ve ALWAYS made back my own salary and then some, so logic says hire me.
OK, enough complaining. I know 9.something% of the whole country is in this situation as well. It’s just frustrating the hell out of me and since it’s me, it matters to me more. How’s that for honesty?
On to happier topic. Computer desktops. I like to change mine. A lot. And while I like to draw detailed designs on my tablet when creating blog/web site graphics for myself and others I much prefer simple, preppy OR Lilly desktop backgrounds.
This is what I had up when my blog had the sailboat theme, right before I switched to raising money for Alzheimer’s. Nothing too fancy, but fun and preppy. Perfect for summer. I like it!
Right now, this is what I have up. Not gonna lie, I totally stole my dear College Prep
‘s idea here because I wanted a fun summery Lilly background before fall hit. I had up her Koi background before this (totally fabulous), but I just wanted something lighter while it still feels seasonally appropriate.
Which begs the question: Should computer desktops even be subjected to seasonal fashion rules? Or should every day be worthy of an oasis?
What do you think?